#CelebrateWomen: Mums@Work

In honour of International Women's Day, we interviewed 4 amazing women who inspire us with their success stories.

In this post, we speak to Sher-Li Torrey, Founder of Mums@ Work to find out how she balances a business catered for mothers and her family!

Sher-Li Torrey

Founder of Mums@Work, Author, Speaker, Trainer, Gender-Equality Advocator

1. With children, there must not be a ‘usual day’. But how does your schedule typically look like on the weekdays and weekends?

Sherli-Torrey: For weekdays, I try to arrange my schedule around my daughter’s school schedule. That means mornings, after they both go off to school, from 8:30am to 2pm, I try to squeeze in face-to-face meetings. It matches with the days when my 9 year old is in school for CCA etc.

Mornings for work are to:

- catch up with social media updates for the company

- clear emails

- do all admin work (programme design etc)

- Phone calls are reserved for 1030am – 1230pm

- All important work is cleared by 2pm, if possible.

There are about 2 days out of 5 days where I dedicate the whole day to work. I usually try to schedule all trainings, workshops that I conduct on those 2 days.

I try to also keep Wednesday afternoons free (at least 3 out of 4 Wednesdays per month) – I pick my daughter up from school and we go for a one-on-one lunch date before she heads of to her enrichment class at 3pm.  Once a month, I keep the rest of the afternoon free and pick up the 6 year old from child care to spend the rest of the afternoon with him.

If I do have to go out for meetings, I usually try to make sure I am home by 5pm so that I can be with my 2^nd kid, who turns 6 this year. Then for the next 3-4 hours, I focus on them – helping with school work, occasionally cooking dinner and so on. When they go to bed at 9:30pm, I clear emails and all online work. This is actually my “prime time”. I stay up till 12:30am or 1am to do all the work that requires 100% concentration.

As for weekends, most of it is dedicated to the kids and my husband. We make sure we have a family sporting activity in the evening. For example, we hike, bike, run or go for an active sports event. Sunday mornings are date time with the husband when the kids attend Chinese class while nights are dinner with my extended family. 

I must admit that a lot of it is dependent on scheduling; I plan my entire week on Sunday, from what to buy when I go to the market on Sunday late morning, what the kids bring to school for their bento, to which phone calls to take. I love planning.

 2. After having your first child, at what point did you decide to return to work and why?

ST: I went back after 3 months, because I have always enjoyed working, and I had a WONDERFUL boss who allowed me to convert and spread out my remaining 1 month maternity leave. So I spent every Friday as a half day (till the one-month was up). That was my first taste of flexible work arrangements and I saw how one morning away allowed me to do so much, such as running errands.

 3. What are some challenges you have met when applying for jobs and going for interviews?

ST: I did not have as much – because I left to start my business which is centred on helping mothers get back to work.

 4. What tips do you have for mothers who hope to return to work after a hiatus?

ST: A few important rules:

• Have confidence – don’t let the career gap make you feel that you are not as good as you used to be. You have to have confidence, before you can convince employers that you are still talent. From my experience, mums that have found their way back to work first are always confident and have very strong EQ skills.
• Be very sure that you want to return to work. Too many of the candidates we have put through to jobs, change their mind on the eve of accepting the role. If you are just “testing the waters”, don’t! Ask yourself what is your role in the family; have you figured out what changes are going to happen when you want to return to work? Are you ready?
• After thinking through, plan your career path. Before children, the career path you had may have involved travelling a lot or long hours. With a child, things have to change. Shift of priorities; ask what you can give up in exchange for what you gain. DONT SEE IT AS A SACRIFICE because if you do, you will always be angry. I have heard mums from the online community say that they are so angry with their kid because they had to give up their careers. No one is going to force you. Instead, YOU choose the path you want to take. Whatever path you choose will come with sacrifices. Ask what you gain in exchange. It is about shifts, not sacrifices.
• Embark on your job search and treat it as a “job", a project. Be aware of what you want, and reach out to networks.
• Be adaptable; things have changed since your gap. Ask "what is new?". What requires you to relook a situation?

5. Any advice you can give others who hope to help and support a Mumpreneur in the family?

ST: A Mumpreneur is not a stay-at-home-mum. Technically, it is a working mother, but she works from home. I find that many Mumpreneurs take on way more duties than a working mum. Very often, the women we work with in our 37,000 member community say that they find everyone making them run errands, as though they are not working. Just because she is physically at home does not mean she is meant to do everything. Imagine a full-fledged employer who runs a café; would you task her to still do things such as cook all 3 meals for the family, send the post, send the car for repairs? I find this a usual challenge for Mumpreneurs. Many complain about burn-out, but it’s almost as though we do not give them the same “luxury” of being free to push their business goals like we would a normal entrepreneur.

So, as their family – give them the time and money to help them fulfil their goals!

 6. Do you think that employers in Singapore are progressing towards a friendlier work-family balance? If so, where do you see it happening? And what can employers do to show support?

ST: Yes, I have seen so many changes since 2010! When we first started out, companies did not even know what flexible work arrangements were. These days, companies are open to trying to help their employees stay commited. We see many clients who ask for help in offering jobs to mothers. So far our clients include Mastercard, Google, Microsoft, Airbnb, Standard Chartered Bank, Ernst & Young and Bank of America Merril Lynch.

 But we do see way more companies being very positive about helping women succeed in their careers.

 7. Have you been discriminated against for being a mumpreneur?

ST: YES! Early in my career, a male entrepreneur said to me “Your hobby business?”. It made me more determined to succeed!

 8. What are some obstacles you have faced as a woman in a leadership role? 

ST: Perhaps because of my work, we are pushing for a change in:

1. The way hiring is done – no discriminiation against women who take career breaks to look after family
2. The way women are perceived as not being ideal for leadership because we need to take maternity breaks.

I do get a lot of male bosses that sometimes can pass fairly gender discriminating comments. 

9. How have you responded to gender discriminating comments, and what advice would you give to mumpreneurs who encounter them as well?

ST: To be honest, mine are more about hiring of women; Employers who say that women should not be working. I usually ignore them and try to not address the issue. If there is bias, the only solution is to prove otherwise.